Showing posts with label personal development. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal development. Show all posts

Depression Self Help

One of the problems that affect us humans is a state of mind referred to as depression.

Exactly what is depression?

Why do we suddenly find ourselves stuck in a sea of inertia, unable to think positively, unable to hold on to positive thoughts, frozen in a zombie like state of inactivity?

Even experts disagree on the core causes of depression and the methods of treatment. Should they be palliative or something more uncompromising?

This is of course no help to us if we are immersed in the thickening fog of a bout of depression.

If we ever find ourselves in a state of depression we must find and build from within the strength, the motivation, the wish and the will to conquer this debilitating mind set.

First of all we have to accept that we alone allowed ourselves to drift into this parlous way of thinking.

The trigger could have been any one of a million reasons and may well have been an external event over which we had no control, however the antidote  has to be found within us and is under our control.

The first thing we need to understand is that we are not alone.

Read the newspapers and watch TV and over and over again there are accounts of people we would probably regard as ’having everything’ checking themselves into this or that clinic for help with some problem or other.

What for one person may be simply a mild set back can for another become the trigger which then sets off the internal self defeating process of the ‘poor me’ syndrome.

Why is it that a situation which is a mild irritation for one person can lead another to almost suicidal tendencies?

The answer is because we are all different in some way.

A visit to one of the many web sites offering behavioural profiling services will help you to identify your personal style as a first step to better understanding yourself

Once you understand why you react the way you do to certain situations you may then set about arranging your life so as to avoid those situations in the future or at least be better prepared to handle them when they do confront you.

Understanding yourself and why you react the way you do to situations with which you are faced is a prime initial requisite for self help with depression.

Learning, understanding and accepting that we can control what we allow to be accepted as fact by our brain is the next step. So often an initial perception turns out to be inaccurate.  Generally speaking nothing is ever so bad or, as good as it may at first appear.

What is important is to understand that it is possible for us to move to a position where we take preventative steps to ensure that we stay clear of infectious negative thoughts in the future.

Negative thoughts are the seed pearls of depression. These negative thoughts and internal video recordings of past failure and disappointment clog up our brain. They lay there dormant just waiting for the right set of circumstances to explode into action and cloud our thinking.

The late Dr. Hall, a clinical psychologist of international renown devoted his life to helping people understand who they were and then encouraging them to take the necessary steps to become who they really wanted to be.

Doctor George Hall discovered that it is possible to install a brain filter which stops negatives from being accepted by the brain. Just as we may install a virus checker or a firewall on our PC or Lap top we can install the same preventative systems in our brain.

Dr. Hall developed a personal development course called ‘Human Cybernetics’ it was a blueprint to follow for those who really did want to self improve and fully develop their potential in life.

I was privileged to be a student of Dr. Hall in 1975 and the tutorials he led were life changing for those of us fortunate enough to be exposed to his teachings.

Dangerous self talk and replaying internal tapes of past failures and disappointments he always propounded to be the most debilitating of activities a human being could engage in as this activity served only to reinforce a negative self image.

Negative self talk must immediately be replaced by constructive self talk and optimistic visual imaginings. Those negative tapes and videos in the mind must be deleted and recorded over with new images of success and achievement. 

There are many self help courses available today. Try running a search on personal development or something similar and you will find many, many sites offering help and assistance much of which is free of charge.

There are also sites offering self-awareness questionnaires which are designed to help you focus on any deep seated negatives which may be holding you back from achieving your life dreams.

This may then be used by you as a platform from which to launch your new beginnings.

Self help for depression is all about taking that first step to control your future thoughts and activity.

Decide today to take charge of your life and to live it as you want to and not as others would have you live it.

Whatever you do, do it for you!


Break Free From Depression Helplessness

I recently posted an article to my website about how certain beliefs underpin stress, depression and anxiety. One of the main beliefs I briefly introduced concerns helplessness. Helplessness is a major part of these illnesses so let’s look at how you can reduce the impact this flawed belief has.

Believing you are helpless in life is a truly terrible feeling and I write from personal experience here. For five years, a number of traumatic events led me to the point where I believed life held nothing but pain and anguish. I truly believed life would unfold in a way that would destroy me and there wasn’t a single thing I could do about it.

Perhaps you’ve felt this way too?

The underlying belief is the important factor here. It is a firm belief that life is something that happens to you and you have NO CONTROL over anything. In short, you are a powerless, passive recipient for whatever life decides to throw at you.

It is an awful state to be in. Furthermore, this belief simply isn’t true.

Let me give an example. Say you and your partner split up. Now, this can be one very traumatic experience, I’ve been through it, so have many others. You react in a highly negative and emotionally arousing way:

“I’m devastated. He/she was my whole world and now my world has fallen apart. Everything I do in life always goes wrong and this is another disaster. I’ll never be happy again.”

Wow. It’s a powerful reaction isn’t it? I’m sure you, like me, have either reacted this way to an event or you’ve heard someone react this way. It is a very damaging way to assign a meaning to an event you are confronted with.

The last two sentences reveal the belief in helplessness. The key words are: Everything always goes wrong and never be happy again. When you react in such a way, you are telling yourself that you are helpless because nothing has ever gone right for you and you’ll never be happy no matter what. You’re saying you cannot control anything and therefore, you truly believe you’re helpless.

How do you think you’ll feel when you react like this? Exactly. You’ll feel deeply unhappy, confused, frustrated and of course, helpless to change your life. Why would you feel anything else? Everything ALWAYS goes wrong and you’ll NEVER be happy again so what’s the point of doing anything to create change?

Do you see how helplessness works? But it simply isn’t true. Of course, there are many things in life that are entirely beyond your control. Other people and Mother Nature to name but two. There are things in life you have some control over – where you live and work for example. It is important to keep these facts about control firmly in mind.

Here’s the most important fact about helplessness: There is one thing you have full control over in your life and that is how you react and assign meanings to everything you are confronted with. In the example above, a better reaction would be:

“OK, my relationship hasn’t worked but other things in my life are going well and I’ll concentrate on them for a while as I come to terms with what’s happened. Just because this relationship hasn’t worked out, it doesn’t mean future relationships will fail and once I’ve got over this, I’ll get out there and find someone better.”

See the difference? You’re keeping control by assigning a less emotional meaning, a meaning more in keeping with reality. You’re acknowledging that you’re hurting, but that this is temporary and when you’re ready, you’ll try again. You know you have other things in your life that you can concentrate on and this reaction will prevent a feeling of helplessness arising.

See you soon.